Sew Fetch

Sew Fetch West Coast Correspondent: Haiku Edition

You guys, my first piece of fan mail! This comes from my dear friend Stacy, who from here on out will be known as Sew Fetch West Coast Correspondent SG. SFWCCSG. Or maybe just Stacy.

Stacy lives in LA, is far cooler than I, and works for an amazing production company. She also writes a blog about dating Adam Levine (in her head). It’s getting serious. One day when she is incredibly famous, funnier than Tina Fey and better looking than Amy Poehler, I hope Stacy remembers the little bloggers people. Did you hear me, Stace? I’d like to star as “crazy best friend” on your hit Showtime series. Or at least have a recurring walk on role. Or just say one really really funny thing, on one episode, in a flashback sequence.

The below photos are from Stacy and I’s trip to Moscow in Spring 2009. Please note my Burberry umbrella and blunt bangs and dare me to start a fashion blog.

Stacy and I with our new friend, a Russian street vendor and the holder of the Moscow Polar diving record (we purchased these hats and wore them for the remainder of our trip. I assume the only reason we weren’t stoned to death was because of my fluent Russian, which to this day has been most useful when flirting with cab drivers)

Stacy and I at a St. Petersburg restaurant celebrating her 21st birthday. I really need to post some undated pictures here so that readers don’t think I still have blunt bangs that I cut myself in a hotel bathroom in London. 

Fan Mail Exhibit A:

subject: xoxo

i’m envious of your blogging. i wish i had the time.  if you ever need guest contributors, i’m your girl. been writing haikus at my desk. i feel like you would like them:

Skinny As Fuck
What’s The deal sista?
Leg the same size as my arm
Eat a cheeseburger.

Impossible to Tell
Flannel shirt hangs loose
Eating chicken nuggets
Hipster or homeless?

iPhone 4
Ugh I always press
the mute button with my face
You’ll think I hung up

Miss you. wish we were together! Hope NYC is treating you lovelyyyy. I will let you know next time im in the city!

SFWCCSG, I’m inspired. Especially because I have faced both the iPhone and the hipster problem myself.

Below, some musings on New York life, in 5-7-5.

Murray Hill
Every girl I meet
went to camp with my cousin

Paycheck! A hard choice
Every month I must decide
Proenza or rent?

Makes me sad to see
You share jokes with your iPhone
Steve: One, World: Zero

Slutty Coworker
Girl, I recognize
Dress and shoes from yesterday
Call in sick next time

I think I will make haikus a regular feature on Sew Fetch. Leave topic suggestions in the comments. Thanks, SFWCCSG!


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